Being a writer is not glamorous. Writers spend a lot of time in solitude. It’s not the most social of careers. Writers get so caught up in building relationships with their characters that we can sometimes lose sight of our relationships that exist in the real world. To be a writer while simultaneously having a family or friends requires surrounding yourself by people who love you from the inside out, people who genuinely want you to be happy, and if you’re lucky a few people who understand you. I’m blessed to have many people in my life that possess all of these characteristics.
My husband should win an award. Today he told me that he feels like he hasn’t seen me in days. Even though I haven’t physically gone anywhere, when I’m writing, mentally I retreat. He respects when I have to go into isolation and allows me to explore other worlds while he takes care of our children and supports me in the most courteous ways like ensuring that I eat as I often forget to when I write.
I have friends that will stop what they’re doing to critique my work and take their time to give me honest, insightful feedback to make me better. I can go months without speaking to my best friend then when we finally connect our conversations are uplifting and energize me to push forward towards my goals. Every person that I’m connected with on a daily basis is excelling in their careers and passionate about their work watching them inspires me. It’s because of their commitment to their own personal goals that they respect and understand mine. These relationships add value to my life, keep me balanced, and motivate me, I don’t know who I’d be without them.
We’ve all heard the saying, be careful of the company you keep, or at least some version of this. This statement is a golden rule for me. At this stage in my life, I have to be overprotective of my time, talent, and energy. The people I share my space with have to be genuine, love me for who I am, and understand what I'm working towards. These key traits are not optional. I hold this same standard on myself as a friend. I want to be a blessing and add value to the people who allow me into their space. I want them to trust that I’m not here to waste their time but instead to encourage, uplift, and inspire. I love when I leave conversations filled with ideas, stimulated, and revitalized these real-life relationships often inspire traits in my characters. It's because these characters are so important to me that leaving them for extended visits to earth, has to be worth my time.